I'm Evolving, I'm Evolving!! Now if only I could draw

Hello! I'm pleased to say that I figured it out!! Here I am posting a new comment to my very own blog. I've just returned from school, art school, where I am living out my dream, by learning how to make my own art. There's one problem though. I think I can't draw. My teacher Professor Awesome is highly unconcerned with this, and even told me he thought my thinking that I can't draw is a result of "years of mistreatment through the education system"!!!! He is truly my dream teacher. And of course he's right. Except. I still can't draw. I certainly feel that way. We do stuff that seems crazy, like 'blind contour drawing' which means looking at your subject (today a naked woman) and NEVER looking at the paper, so it's 'blind'. It's really great as it is meant to liberate you from the Grade 8 teacher yelling at you inside your head saying "YOU SUCK", or atleast meant to liberate me from mine.

Anyways, so that's fun, but the ones which last 10, even 20 minutes of trying to draw the model in some pose and make it look realistic are much harder. I've told my classmates they will see me cry before the end of the year, and I was pretty close today. All Professor Awesome wants me to do is "Work hard and draw exactly how you draw, exactly your way that no one else can do", but all I want to do is be "perfect little girly drawing perfectly nice so you all know I'm a good girl", and it's hard to just draw like me when I'm trying to be perfect little girly who draws perfectly. I wonder what drawing perfectly would look like - it would probably be really boring actually. The one thing you can say about my drawings are that they have a lot of 'life energy', they're very squiggly like Van Gogh's paintings. Only his didn't suck. I tried to cross that out, but I guess this blog doesn't offer that option. Anyways, I don't really totally think I suck any more. Just mostly think it - that's an improvement.

So I have to get my courage up, because I have to hand in a drawing project in 1 week, which is about 35" x 65" on white cardboard, which is supposed to be one thing morphing or turning into another thing. It makes me think of boy's drawings in highschool, a dragon transforming into fire or something. Very not me. And Professor Awesome has forbidden anything from nature, like flowers, trees etc. He says it's because he's seen too many smiling flowers... can you really blame him. So my idea for subject matter is a baby turning into a mattress. Why? I have no idea, it's just the only hint of inspiration I have. I'm going to photocopy and blow up a photo of me as a baby, and after I post this, try to find an image of a bed to do the same. Uggh... I guess I don't have to get an "A" on every project, right?

Well folks, that's all for now. Tomorrow maybe I'll write something on John the Baptist - I'm learning lots of Bible stories from my Art History class.

Best regards,
your cousin